![]() Remember: The proof of the passion is in the pursuit. Prayer is necessary in our search for a life partner, but prayer alone without taking responsibility to be proactive in seeking out opportunities to meet people will not be effective. If I pray hard enough, God will send me The One Obviously, this theory does not hold water. Then what you are saying is literally out of the seven billion people in this world, there is one that is The One. Many people are under the notion that there is only one perfect one waiting for me out there. Thus, in our quest to find The One, we need to be proactive and yet not demanding. In other words, it comes with a sense of timing and the unfolding of events. The word “find” here is the Hebrew word matsa, which means to “discover”, “uncover” or “cause to encounter” – something that happens in the course of things rather than a desperate demanding search. “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favour from the Lord.” (Proverbs 18:22) It comes with an element of “demanding” or “craving”. The word “look” here is the Greek word zeteo, which means “seek in order to find”. Are you unmarried? Do not look for a wife.” (1 Corinthians 7:27) This tension can be illustrated through these verses: This can include making the necessary changes like changing your hairstyle, buying breath freshener, dropping a few excess kilos, using deodorant or taking a crash course on “How to Win Friends and Influence People”. This is where you need to hold the tension between trusting God’s leading and being proactive in taking responsibility in your search for a life partner. If you ever feel this way, you should keep it to yourself and act as if you have heard nothing. Others resort to statements like “God told me you are The One I must marry”. ![]() They make pious statements like “If God wants me to be married, He will send bring a man to me” or “If I just pray and wait, God will send someone to me”. There are also many single Christians who have spiritualised the entire quest for a soulmate. I want to encourage you not to withdraw from this quest, but resolve to live life to the fullest and keep an open mind about who God can bring along your way.įinding love during a pandemic: What online dating taught us So they crawl into this dark and lonely cave. The journey is just too hard and too long. They bury themselves in work or spend time at home watching bad Netflix. Or maybe they have been rejected too many times, so they quit the quest completely. In this way, we can then engage in the process of waiting upon the Lord while looking out for divine appointments that may come along the way at the same time. Get the feelings out through talking to God about them, journalling some of those thoughts down and sharing them with significant people in your life like your trusted friends or pastor. In our quest to find The One, we need to be proactive and yet not demanding. ![]() It is better to acknowledge that desire and face the feelings that are there. Deny the desireĪnother wrong way to deal with these pressure points is simply to deny the desire to find a life partner. But this can be unhealthy because we are seeking to suppress a God-given desire. I want to challenge you to never compromise when it comes to the choice of a life partner. It is far better to be single and alone than married and miserable because of the wrong choice of a life partner.ĭon’t just take anyone but choose the one that you want. We need to remember that what we are looking for is Mr/Ms Right and not Mr/Ms Right Now! Only after that do all the hidden skeletons of their lives start to emerge. I have seen several cases where couples get married after a few short months of “dating”. Or at best, they end up not actually finding a true soulmate. They jump into a relationship with anyone who is willing.Īnd the result can only be disastrous. They end up picking up potential prospects in dating apps, pubs, etc. Singles press the panic button and take whatever comes along.Īs time drags on, the mindset of “beggars cannot be choosers” kicks in. This is one of the most common responses. The question is, how do singles cope with them? 4 TYPICAL RESPONSES SINGLES TAKE 1. All these comments can be very pressurising for a single person.
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